Category Archives: people

Ok…Now On to the Craziness….

So since the last time that I actually blogged, I discussed my trials with quitting smoking, and I am proud to say that I have been a non-smoker for ten months now, and I am feeling better as the days go by.  There are occasions where I feel like that COPD commercial with the elephant sitting on me and inhibiting my movements, but I am chalking that up to the fact that my lungs are rebuilding themselves.  I do wish however that I was truly in a smokefree environment, but it is what it is.

My father’s brother, who happened to be my favorite uncle, had his house foreclosed on and he needed a place to stay so he calls us up out of the blue and asks if he can stay here.  I was terribly apprehensive at the thought, because I know what it’s like to live with family members, and when it doesn’t work out, a family tie is broken.  Which is what happened in this case.  My sister decided to approve of him staying here, so we let him stay.  Everyone seemed to like the idea that my uncle was going to stay here.  Even our grandmother Nanny cosigned on Donny being here.  Problem was that this man is a sever drug addict and he misuses his prescription medication.  Now keep in mind that he never told me he did drugs or anything like that, he did however tell my sister that he did drugs.  This man abused his Nortriplene and Oxycotin.  He would take 10 of the Oxycotin every time he “claimed” he was in pain.  I’m sorry I never bought the amount of pain that he was in.  His shivering and shaking and moaning and groaning seemed to be contrived and he only seemed to put on that act whenever someone was around.

He would hallucinate, and claim, “big beings as large as brown cats” were disappearing through the walls.  He would literally eat us out of house and home.  Never replacing what he ate.  He would rummage through our cabinets at night while we slept.  Then he would turn around and accuse us of stealing from him.  He would sit in the living room and count his Oxycotin claiming pills were missing.  Yeah you think idiot?  I mean really you take 10 of them at a time, that bottle surely is not going to last you.

What would get me the most about this man was the fact that we would pay him to take my sister to work and he would never get her to work on time because he would always like pull over to the side of the road because he had the “urge” to urinate.  Oh yeah I forgot to mention that he had Interstitial Cystitis, so he would live in the bathroom every moment because of his urge to urinate that would never seem to happen and he would fall asleep on the toilet.  Luckily for us we had a bathroom in the basement, but just because we have one does not mean I want to use it.  Or rather I am forced to use it because some jackass was that inconsiderate of his hosts.

Everyday he would leave this house late to go sit with Nanny (oh yeah I forgot to mention how he would grift me out of funds because he was making unnecessary trips to pick up Nanny to ride with him while he took my sister to work.  That would be another reason why he would get my sister to work late.  My grandmother lived the opposite way of my sister’s job.  Complete opposite by a lot of miles and he would make these roundabout trips everyday.  Each time claiming he didn’t know how he would be able to pick up my sister because his car was out of gas.

When we finally got the nerve up to ask this man to leave, his behavior got even more strange.  As a matter of fact the day I reinforced my sister’s request for him to leave, he sat in the dark in the living room.  That was freaky, because I stopped coming our of my room the entire time he was here because he was creeping me out.  He was losing his boundaries, and I was tired of him being here.  I don’t like drug addicts and I don’t like alcoholics.  I don’t know what is worse between the two, but I don’t like it around me.

Well as he sat there in the dark, it kept me on edge, then he finally turned on the light and fell and broke our dining room table.  However, when you look at the table, the break is not a result of his foot getting caught in the rug and falling on the table, but a direct hit with a fist.  The data presented contradicted what he said, so my guess is he called himself coming around the corner to ambush me and got caught up.  The stuff on the table was not moved from a fall, and the thick glass was cracked not because he hit his head on the table, but because he put his fist through it.

I was putting him out the next day, and I couldn’t wait for him to leave.  Only thing was he pulled his extreme urge to urinate act for 5 hours, until I came out of my room and made him “wrap it up” and leave.  That man was creepy. I don’t like him now, and I am extremely bitter over the ordeal that my sister and I had to go through.

Then to make matters worse we found out that he was sending his money to someone in Jamaica (some type of get rich quick scheme).  He never contributed to this household.  Never offered a dollar or two for food. Yet he had the audacity to send it to Jamaica?  He watched us struggle to feed the members in this house and that was the payback that we got.

I remember after our dad died, no one on his side of the family ever came around to see if we needed anything or even offered us food (partly because they didn’t like our mother) yet here was this man (who really was my favorite uncle until now) showed up at our doorstep for help.  I don’t even remember him showing up to our house with so much as a loaf of bread, but he needed our help.  Like I explained to him that I wanted things to stay the way that they were.  If no-one ever came around or did things with us, I wanted it to stay that way.  I wanted it to remain consistent.

Now?  He can’t even come by and ask for a glass of water.
It doesn’t pay to take advantage of your family members.


Congratulations President Obama and Vice President Joe Biden

I am so excited for President Obama being re-elected into office. My heart beams with pride and extreme joy. This campaign was the most trying, the most RACIST and the most hateful campaign…well, besides the Mccain/Palin buffoonery.

What I did enjoy about the whole campaign was the people said enough of the Romney Tomfoolery and voted against that man.  The man with no plan.  He had an agenda, too bad he didn’t share it with America, but he had an agenda.  His plan?  Keep the rich rich, and the other 47% of the nation poor.  His campaign ads were a joke.  His 3 token blacks were funny.  Every time he was shown shaking their hands he looked like it was a painful thing to do.  Let’s not even talk about what he planned to do for women.  Oh say set them back a few centuries.

I had friends that voted for Romney because they were so mis-informed about Obama and the facts and… well let’s face it…this bigoted nation does not want a black man in office that they will do anything to keep him out of it.  The Republicans were so convinced that Romney won the first round of the debates that they banked on the people to kick Obama out.  WRONG!!!!  The people showed that.  I mean the numbers says all: Obama’s 332 to Romney’s 206.  That wasn’t even a close win.  Obama toppled Romney, fair and square.

For all the people that flip-flopped their opinions during this campaign, I was not worried one minute about Obama winning this election. I was so tired of everyone and their bigotry.  Romney  and the Republican party had an agenda, and that was to try to keep the black man out of office, by any means necessary.  They just didn’t expect the turnout at the polls.  Now they are trying to say that the votes weren’t fair and the numbers were padded.  “Waa, waa, waa,”  owning voting machines and trying to suppress the black vote isn’t fair either, but no one is whining about that.

Election day I got up  and marched over to the polling place to cast my vote.  I was proud!  I even videotaped myself walking to the polling center.  I was glad the center was set up the old fashioned way with paper and pens because the machines were set up to change the votes to Romney automatically if you voted for Obama (now who’s fair?)  Just another slick way for Romney to steal votes. That was my biggest concern. Romney stealing votes and actually getting away with it. I prayed for Obama and the nation. I just could not fathom America being set back centuries because some  jackwad would have say over what a woman does with her body, and America would be robbed of its resources to keep the wealthy…wealthy.  My friends that voted for him, I look at them differently now, I can’t believe how ignorant they have become.  All the way down to their comments even after Obama won.

We won.  America won.  That is all that matters to me.  The best man is in office.  The best man shall stay.  I’ve got Obama’s back.  I believe in our president.  Obama and Joe, the best team for America!

  Thank you America! You made the right choice!

Has It Really Been That Long?

Wow! I cannot believe it has been three years since I last blogged. I always had things I wanted to write about, just never took the time to jot them down. To sum up my year, in July my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer, on January 7th 2012 she lost her battle. As a result I decided I would quit smoking because I didn’t want any of my family members to sit in hospice watching me take my last breath. That’s not fair, especially if it was something that I could have prevented. I will say that since I have quit smoking, I have been sicker than I have ever been in my life. I have developed respiratory issues and severe allergies. I am on a steroid treatment for the allergies and I have Ativan for my severe panic attacks and Ambien to help me sleep. Oh yeah….I have become a “head case” as a result of not smoking. I have taken more pills these past few months than I have in my entire life. I do not like it one bit. I just want my life back. Maybe I should journal my trials. There are days I can sit up and feel like I want to tackle the world, and other days where the world is tackling me….The doctors at the hospital think that I am a hypochondriac, as I try to explain to them that there is really something wrong with me physically. So what do they do? They prescribe more pills! I don’t want an addiction. I have no desire to pick up my habit, in fact quitting was easy, I just didn’t realize the detoxification was this terrible. I know my body is on the mend. It just seems like I was healthier when I smoked. Que sera, sera

Control Freaks

I wanted to elaborate a little more on a post that I had started a while ago, but didn’t because I was tired of writing. Sometimes coming up with ideas and actually following through with them can be hard, but this was one post I should not have neglected without further explanation.

See, I’m quite sure that many of us have dealt with “control freaks” in our lifetimes, and walked away feeling drained, dazed and confused when the ride was over. Some may have felt that as a result they lost control of themselves and are now struggling to get back to center.

Control freaks can be defined as someone that has a need to control something/someone because they lack control themselves. Their lives spiral out of control because of decisions they may have made, and instead of taking responsibility for their actions, they lash out at people, places and things. Animals usually get the brunt of most of it because they are the easiest to control and generally don’t fight back from the abuse, they just love us unconditionally – something we should be doing ourselves.

Relationships are pretty interesting because there may be one person that just feels the need to control everything about the other, all the way down to what they may eat and what they can wear. For some of us that can recognize this form of behavior, rebellion often becomes a form of self expression. Although rebellion may not be an appropriate word for this piece, because people choose to do what they want when they want, look how they want, listen to what they want, that one person just has to try to change the general make up of another because they are insecure within themselves. This insecurity becomes an affliction because they try to incapaciate the other because of fear.

Fear is a terribly crippling disease: fear is what keeps nations from accepting and loving each other as brothers and sisters, thus war becomes inevitable. Fear kills relationships. How so? Fear manifests into something greater…jealousy. That green-eyed monster is what keeps people from reaching out to each other and expressing themselves openly and lovingly. Fear also keeps one from exploring other possibilities and reaching true potentials. Just think about all of the things you wanted to accomplish in your lifetime, but somehow didn’t because you were afraid to even try. Some people translate fear into failure, two complete opposites, yet in one’s mind they mean one in the same.

This fear/failure complex siphons into homes, and destroys the very fibers of the relationship. A control freak fears that which cannot be controled and works tirelessly to break down the other’s psyche. Domestic violence is part of the controller’s control. After many years of a controller dismantling the mental and emotional fibers of a person, deprogramming is what I would like to call it, that person is literally devoid of anything: lacks resources to care for themselves without someone telling them how to do it, and unable to pick up the pieces so quickly. Years of treatment is in order to put the puzzle back together, but a terrible stain is forever imprinted in their minds.

For some it is hard to realize that control is actually taking place until they happen to be discussing it amongst their friends and are told that they are being controlled. One way you can actually determine if someone is trying to control you is listen to how you feel whenever you interact with someone. Do you feel wary whenever someone says something that is completely opposite of your convictions? If so, then you need to think of what you need to do to get yourself out of the situation because it isn’t going to get any better. As a matter of fact it will escalate into something greater.

You can be happy in a relationship without someone telling you how to wear your hair, or choosing your music for you. If you like hip-hop and that person likes country music, it is a free world and everyone is entitled to listen to what they want. However, if the person purposefully picks a fight with you because they don’t like Ice Cube and this is a continual occurence, chances are if you opt to listen to Toby Keith just to shut their mouths, you’ve been controlled. If your style has changed because someone cannot handle pencil skirts and pumps, to sweat suits or baggy clothes, trust me…you’ve been controlled. If he faithfully wore his favorite baggy jeans and t-shirt when he relaxed, only to see him in dress slacks and a button down shirt on the weekend and he grimaces when he walks down the street…trust me, he was controlled.

People fail to realize that we were bestowed with rights as individuals when we took our first breath into this “grand world,” although for some, rights are not as open and free and even the freedom to practice what they believe in is encroached upon. Third world countries strip people of their rights immediately, so let’s refer to America as a basis for this topic. We have rights…we are individuals, and there is nothing worse than a husband or wife, girlfriend or boyfriend, father or mother trying to strip you of your values, convictions, and morals to suit their purpose.

It is not right and it is not fair to devalue another person’s lifestyle and choices because it doesn’t fit your lifestyle. On one hand if you actively pursued someone that was quite the opposite of what you are, can you justify the hardships and torment you place upon them? No. You either take them as they are or leave them alone. Now this is not to say that you may run into someone that may appear to be a little “rough” around the edges and you offer (note the operative word here) suggestions to help them improve themselves; i.e., they want to improve their vocabulary so you get them books to further enrich their skills or they want to learn a trade so you help them get into school, etc… This is called helping your fellow man, not to be confused with changing them to your design. They suggested the change and may have even asked for help, that is the big difference.

Controllers do not acknowledge individualism, in fact that is a threat to them. Understand once again a controller is someone that lacks control in their lives, so they have to control something in order to feel significant. Think about it, if you never called someone a billion times in a day and now you’re dealing with someone that balks at the fact that you don’t call at least ten times before noon, you should be concerned. That behavior will only get worse, and no matter how much you try to explain that you were working, there will be someone chomping at the bit because you “could have taken some time out of your day to at least see how they were doing.” That is selfish, unfair and unrealistic.

Also, when you find yourself constantly defending something or explaining “why” you chose to do something, listen to something, read something, eat something, etc…you really should reevaluate the entire situation and take control of you. You should pack your bags and leave. You should stop answering your phone, you should stop making those ten calls before noon and walk away before something terrible happens. It begins with you and your control of yourself.

If you control and you wonder why people stop hanging around you as much, or why you cannot have a substantial relationship with others without using force or strong-arming them into loving you, then you should seek professional help to tap into what is driving you to control others rather than yourself. I know, easier said than done because you have to admit to yourself that there is a problem before you can actually seek help…but I do believe that controllers are quite aware of what they are doing when they get a rush out of the control for their own benefit.

Being responsible for yourself is essential. If we can take stock of our own lives, we can enrich other’s lives with the differences we bring to the table. As unique human beings, with our own minds and bodies…The question would be, “would you rather be a robot or an individual?”

Be your own puppeteer and pull your own strings…

Are You A Hip Hop Apologist?

I’m so excited that I just received my Guerilla Funk Newsletter that I feel inclined to share the entire contents…This is something everyone needs to reflect upon…So direct from Paris, “Are You a Hip-Hop Apologist?”

“Since the Imus controversy recently erupted there has been a lot of finger-pointing and blame-placing as to what the root of the problem really is. Of course, we all know that racism and sexism existed before hip-hop — that’s a given. But it’s completely beside the point when our (black) culture is dictated to us by white corporations. Follow me…

For the record, most folks in our communities didn’t even know Don Imus before he made headlines with his slurs (and many still don’t). For the most part, we remain oblivious to the tirades of him, Bill O’Reilly, Sean Hannity and others who constantly malign us and foster a climate of intolerance simply because these talking heads don’t speak to US. For Imus to blame black culture as being the reason for his ignorance is both sad and backwards. He’s a racist and a sexist, pure and simple, and he can’t blame an art form or a culture that I’m certain he has little knowledge of for his actions. The fact that he named hip-hop “culture” as a culprit is telling, however.

If you haven’t noticed by now, life imitates art — it’s not the other way around. There is no stronger cultural influence on people now than popular media, and hip-hop is at the forefront. Ask almost any child about the lyrics to a popular song or a scene from a video or movie and more often then not they will know the details better than they know their school lessons.
Entertainers and the culture of celebrity that we find ourselves living in often hold more weight with kids then parents, educators, preachers politicians or even sports heroes. Can we blame some rappers for selling completely out? Of course. Be we have to look at the entire picture.

The argument is often made by Russell Simmons and others that rappers are poets who simply report on what we feel and our surroundings, and that we shouldn’t be censored. On that point we partially agree — we shouldn’t be censored. But balance between the negative and positive needs to be provided, and it currently isn’t. Most artistic integrity is questionable at best. My understanding is that artists are supposed to express what they believe in at all costs (if not, there’s work at the post office). But most don’t, and they mold their approaches to making music based on what they perceive major labels wanting. If Def Jam or Interscope or any of these other large culture-defining companies issued a blanket decree that they would only support material and artists with positive messages then 99% of those making music now would switch up to accommodate. That’s real talk. I’m not saying these labels should (or would), but if they did, gangstas would stop being ga! ngstas and misogynists would stop being misogynists at the drop of a DIME. Many artists are like children, and most will say and do what is expected of them in order to benefit financially. And although there is definite self-examination that needs to take place within the artist community, the lion’s share of the blame falls on the enablers who only empower voices of negativity. Record labels and commercial radio often use the excuse that they are “responding to the streets” and that they are “giving the people what they want.” BULLSHIT. They dictate the taste of the streets, and people can’t miss what they never knew. The fact is that there are conscious decisions made by the big business and entertainment elite daily about what to present to the masses — and it is from those choices that we are allowed to decide what we do and do not like. Who presents the music that callers are invited to “make or break” on the radio? That callers are invited to “! vote on” on T.V.? Who decides on what makes it to the store s! helves o r the airwaves at all? Like I said, life imitates art, and pseudo-black culture is determined by those other than us every day. Walk into any rap label or urban radio station and you can count the number of black employees on one hand.

The argument in response could be made in defense of labels that if they don’t respond to the streets then the music will just go underground. Huh? WHAT underground? Do you know how much good material is marginalized because it doesn’t fit white cooperate America’s ideals of acceptability? Independents can’t get radio or video play anymore, at least not through commercial outlets, and most listeners don’t acknowledge material that they don’t see or hear regularly on the radio or on T.V. Very few of us are willing to actually seek out material and messages to identify with. As with anything in our fast food culture, we want our entertainment choices fast and in our collective face. For most listeners, all the rest need not apply.

What I want to know is, when did the worst in us become normal and accepted? When did it become par for the corporate course that “black man as thug” and “black woman as slut” be business as usual? Major companies now line up to profit from the buffoonery of a few…at the expense of us all. MTV, Viacom, Clear Channel, Boost Mobile, Amp mobile, Chevy, all major record labels and most video games come readily to mind, but there are many others.

I’m not a hater…although I do hate the imbalance in the industry right now and the negativity it fosters. I’m not calling for censorship. You can’t lump me in with the Jesse Lee Petersons and the Armstrong Williamses of the world…bourgeois self-hating black men who demean other black people and profit at our expense. And nobody can say that I’m unqualified to speak on it, since I’ve contributed to the sale of just under 4 million albums independently, still run my own successful counter-establishment label ( and have been embracing messages of self-esteem and self-sufficiency for years.

Like I said, I’m not calling for censorship, but I am calling for balance. I’m calling for more representation of points of view other than gangsta rap and escapism. More revolutionary voices. More voices of women. Where is the diversity? Music can only be kept artificially young and artificially dumb for so long before an inevitable backlash ensues, and that’s what we’re seeing take place now. Overall album sales for the January 1-April 2 period are down 16.6% — with a 20.5% decline in CD album sales since last year — and an even greater decline in hip-hop. Since LAST YEAR (and it was already raggedy last year, believe me). We’re seeing the industry implode before our eyes. I heard somebody say recently that in this current era of style over substance Stevie Wonder, Parliament/Funkadelic, Earth, Wind & Fire, Curtis Mayfield and others would never have been signed. Let tha! t sink in for a second. They would never have been signed. Some of the very architects of black music as we know it would have been sidelined too, just as countless others are now, because they wouldn’t have fit into white corporate America’s cookie-cutter feel-good box of acceptable black behavior and appearance. Same goes for me, Public Enemy (they’ll take the Flav, but not the Chuck), Kam, X-Clan, BDP, Wise Intelligent, dead prez, Zion-I, Mos Def, Talib Kweli, The Roots, Blackalicious, Immortal Technique, The Coup, T-K.A.S.H., Michael Franti and a host of others.

So how many half-naked women sipping Cris draped in blood diamonds poolside will it take before we collectively agree that shit is tired now? How many backward-ass coons with tats and plated grills and pimp cups etc. in the strip club before we all agree that enough is enough and that we need balance? When did the bar get set so low? When will we demand more? And as for Simmons’ argument that “rappers are reporting what they see” etc, how are cocaine-kingpin rhymes or poolside pimp-nigga fantasies anyone’s reality? Miss me with that bullshit argument. Yes, there should be room for all voices to be heard, but we have to be treated and presented equally. Now we have bitches and hos, players and pimps, gangstas and dealers — but no kings and queens, no revolutionaries, no dissent, no political commentary and no anger — how is that? In an era where EVERYTHING is political and people are more disgusted with the way things are more than ever? It’s no mistake. Yes! I can say that we have failed, that we have allowed black culture to once again be co-opted, diluted and prostituted. Commercial rap culture is now to hip-hop is what disco was to funk. No wonder Nas is saying it’s dead.

And who’s to blame? Definitely not artists like the ones mentioned above. Not most artists at all, actually, because we don’t control whether or not we’re seen and heard by the masses. No, the blame needs to squarely sit on the shoulders of those who run the labels, the commercial radio stations, the television studios and the large corporate sponsors who reward only the worst in us and seem hell-bent on pursuing (with little success) the most fleeting, fickle demographic of all — 12-16 year old adolescent females. You know, the demo that’s the most impressionable, with the least amount of loyalty or disposable income. Brilliant.

Know that it’s okay to call shit like it is and quit being cowards worrying about who we’ll offend. It’s okay to blame Simmons, Lyor Cohen, Jimmy Iovine, Kevin Liles, Bob Johnson, Debra Lee, Michael Martin and others of their ilk because the blood is on their hands. They are the gatekeepers of popular culture and they are the ones who determine what you see and hear. They can’t say that their decisions are based on economics when they exclude voices of reason because there are literally hundreds of millions of people globally who feel the same way. What about that consumer base? I guess that money is no good, huh? Fuck outta here… Remember, part of the strategy of mind control is to fool the public into thinking that they have choice. We do, but the playing field is so skewed in the favor of mega-corps that the contributions of the alternatives are often viewed by most as insignificant.

So yes, there is a problem, but the fake “Kumbaya” moment on Oprah yesterday won’t solve it. Are we really going to look to those individuals who have made a killing off of pushing poison to us to fix the problem? We shouldn’t. Instead, we should vote with our dollars and continue the campaign of public shame until we see some concrete change. The music industry as we know it is on its death bed. People are now more tired than ever of ‘music business as usual’ and style over substance.

Imus was an insignificant part of a much greater problem. Sure, his incident open up national discourse regarding issues of race and sex. And yes, it is now more apparent than ever that whites have a hard time acknowledging racist and sexist behavior in other whites as being solely their fault. Most black artists are not to blame, as we often can’t been seen or heard without white help. But it’s important to note that many of us can and should know better when saying and doing the things we say and do. It’s easy to despise the indefensible, and media outlets like Fox News have made good money demonizing those with little real power.

But will we champion the good among us? “
Paris is a successful independent hip-hop artist and founder of Guerrilla Funk Recordings, a musical organization that counters the corporate stranglehold of censorship currently plaguing the entertainment industry. Visit Guerrilla Funk

Wesley Snipes Tax Conviction

“Action star Wesley Snipes sentenced to 3 years for February tax convictions…”

I don’t know what has me most angered about this story. I’m not sure if it is the fact that Wesley Snipes was given such a steep sentence for not paying his taxes that an example has to be made of him, or the idiotic comments that were made after this story.

Since we live in a world that seems to care more about whether or not Brittney Spears or Paris Hilton wore matching underwear with their garments (nevermind the public intoxication and the drinking while driving, being served with harsh sentences of oh say 2-3 days for almost killing people) Wesley Snipes has to be the example for the public. Or perhaps it is the fact that racism is still high on the list in America just sugar coated with America’s ever-growing fascination with life as a “multi-racial” person that we have to follow up with endless searches now of Obama’s mother and grandmother because we’re so intrigued with the color of skin. “Tell me what your life was like growing up?” Uhhhh I’m sure it was the same as yours growing up, we ate ice cream, watched tv, listened to music….played with dolls…ate dinner, went to school (for some of us private schools) and enjoyed those hot lazy summer days with family and friends… Or better yet let’s ask Libby, Thomas Jefferson’s wench….cause it is a known fact that Mr. Jefferson liked chocolate….so get over it…

I mean I am sitting here reading these asinine comments about “negros” and how we should be introduced to an “oak tree” and “rope,” But nevermind all of that because the question still remains, “Why are Black people still so bitter and angry?” (I read that in another set of comments from an ignoramus that just didn’t understand why black people continue to perpetuate hatred towards “white people”) Well let me tell you that when “white people” continue to post comments about “negros” followed by “go back to Africa” and “strange fruit” I can guarantee you Black people will always remain bitter. Oh I know you’re sitting there like “Hey…we’ve done all we can to right the wrongs with black people….why all of this hatred?” I can answer with this, “Black Holocaust” remember that as you peruse your history books filled with false information. Our nation is more ignorant today than it was yesterday….we’re just wearing our ignornaces differently…different clothes….different masks…but reality is still the same. There is no justice for blacks anywhere in America…so why would anyone assume it would get any better?

It is hard to explain the anger that I have deep inside, I find it is almost like trying to describe the Quantum Theory to a Chef or the contemplation of infinity to the checker at the grocery store. If you try to reach someone from a philosophical perspective of being Black in America you’re on the verge of a shadowy understanding that forever eludes their grasp. I’m sure a great number of you can attest to this as you’ve sat in wonderment at the idiot sitting in front of you asking you why you hate white people….”I just don’t understand why you “jigaboos” get so upset…we took care of ya, gave you homes, gave you work, gave you our ‘ligion” Ummmmm….yeah…

But hey there is something that I want you to know….I’m not racist…I just know that “crackers” and “honkys” get on my nerves when they want to sing a round of “Kum Ba Yah” to a despondent negro whose lost “it’s” way; on the premise of erradicating racism because humanity needs to unite without barriers….I wholeheartedly believe in coexisting peacefully with “rednecks” without the added adjectives because we can exist without the barriers….but “honkys” don’t realize that everytime we stumble across an article where the authors so eloquently states that the “nigger” needs to get off their ass and stop expecting a handout or we’ll be seeing great big “oak” trees and ropes, that unity with Europeans is virtually undigestable.

I’m not quite sure why I am trying to discuss race let alone racism and racist comments to a nation of bigots…It is racist and derogatory comments that can stir up a nation or better yet a black woman that has had it with the rhetoric of a dumb “white man” whose disrespectful comments are allowed to remain on a national board. In either respect, Wesley Snipes has to go to federal prison for three years and Brittney is still allowed to drive under the influence while shoplifting for lighters at the neighborhood 7-Eleven.

MySpace…YourSpace: The Invasion Begins!

The other day, I received an email or rather a note from a “disappointed” visitor to MySpace (note: MY SPACE in MySpace Land). The person deemed it necessary to discuss with me my “sins” brought about by my images. The person persecuting me of my sins based upon an image, couldn’t even spell or use proper syntax in a sentence! This very someone actually had the gall to tell me that I was one dimensional and narcissistic. Why? Because I didn’t have pictures posted depicting my family, friends, my job or my life in general. One dimensional and narcissistic. So, in a world filled with tourists to MySpace Land, and the many houses that are built upon it whose mantles happily display their narcissistic and one dimensional image of themselves, I had to be the one to receive the barrage of criticism. I was judged, crucified and buried for depicting my image of the Ankh and was told I needed to learn the key to life. The Key to Life. What does that mean exactly? Is it because I chose to leave out facets of my life that are not important or relevant to the millions of subscribers in MySpace Land? Or, is it because this person believes I should live my life according to their standards and ideals?

Now before I go on my little diatribe, I would like to add that it is important that one proofreads their messages before sending them. I am stating this because, I am not trying to put a person on worldwide blast by posting the entire message, but it was heavily laden with errors that even your English teacher would have failed you for. Since I knew this person was trying to invoke a response, I deliberately played the hand. “It was my duty, to smack that booty!” This person’s message was highly illogical and downright immature. Their voice is just one of the many that try to justify the ‘biochemically-dependent-pill poppin’-vitamin deficiencies in their brains by attacking someone’s free will and expression.

So…let’s just say I sat and pondered that statement for oh, less than a millisecond. That should tell you how much it affected me. I want to take this time to speak for the other millions of artists, musicians, writers and painters because it is very important. Since I never shared an in depth conversation, let alone a “hello”, with this person, I was baffled as to why this person said anything at all. The entire conversation was provoked by imagery; their perceptions are not my reality. I might look a certain way but that look is not indicative of my character. Why do I feel the need for justification here? Simply put, billions of other artists have probably had similar conversations with others and had to justify their work as well. You are always on a defense. It doesn’t matter how much you may transcend the masses with their ideological point of views, you still have to defend your work. Even when it doesn’t matter, you still have to transcribe the verse.

The viewer’s perception of artistic expression is truly individual. Often times they are hindered if they are not out of the box thinkers. So essentially, their point of view is skewed. For example, if you are a marginalized thinker, you are not going to understand Surrealism or for that matter Mannerist Art. What you will interpret are images being coy, narcissistic, provocative and downright lewd. On the other hand, you might see images that are provocative, narcissistic, coy and downright lewd and interpret them as art. It’s all about perception and perception does not dictate a person’s reality.

Go ahead; castigate me because of my images. Just make sure you have an actual appreciation for the Arts. The ever present “flapping booty-cheeks” that are most prevalent in damn-near every home we walk into in MySpace Land, does not represent Art, but rather, the common stereotypes that women oft-times have to defend. These are the very images that inundate our idiot boxes daily. We tune in to see BIG asses in g-strings gyrating everywhere. But my question, do these BIG asses exercise their spherical lobes commonly know as the brain? I can tell you what they do exercise though, the continuation of the very debilitating images that continue to confine us to the marketing moguls who enjoy taking our hard earned paychecks!

However, I cannot hold the owners of the pages entirely responsible per se, because it is just as much the women who perpetuate that shit by clamoring to audition for the roles, albeit by home video or camera phone. That is how they have been conditioned to think, that, that type of disingenuous admiration is an acceptable form of amorous behavior… In simple layman’s terms they think that is what a man finds attractive in a woman. That is conditioning. Actually, it’s good brand marketing! Ass=Man=Money=Sexually Transmitted Diseases which = A lot people infected with Super Viruses that are transferred to the high percentage of Babies that you and me have to support! But, I digress. Well, here’s another scenario, Ass=Man=Domestic Violence=Another Brother caught up in the System=Higher Taxes so that we can pay for his room and board at the Penitentiary=Dysfunctional Household=Illiterate Children running the streets=More Money for room and board at the Pen. Okay, okay, can’t help myself, here’s another one, Ass=Man=Escapism=Drugs=Exploding Meth Lab in your house=Hospital stay at the Burn Unit=Free Ride by the State to your new Vacation Home that is supported by More Money for your room and board. Yes that’s right another free stay! As extreme as those scenarios may seem, that is real life based upon the saturation of negative imagery in the media. That is why “flapping booty-cheeks” are acceptable amongst the masses and perceived as Art. I digress, but that’s okay, because this is MY HOUSE in MySpace Land!

There was an African proverb which stated “one should sweep in front of ones own door”. For those who are unfamiliar with thinking outside of “the box”, let me break it down for you, “sweep your front door, fool, not mine. But yours!” Always worry about yourself, and what yourself is doing, and where yourself is going and who yourself has been with. Then you won’t have to ever worry about no one else!

Bottom line is on a global level, one should be paying attention to the falsehoods we are inundated with daily and not what kind of pictures I have posted on my page. Let’s keep the focus on the macro not the micro. In a world where we spend 99.999% of our time being brainwashed and bamboozled by the government and the media, because they do work cohesively together, we should focus our attention to homelessness, illiteracy and the environment. We live in a country where statistically we rank last in education compared to other countries. Yet, an image that I display on MySpace, an Ankh, causes turmoil. Homelessness has risen almost threefold during the last century, yet, an Ankh causes great disdain. Our environment/world needs to be vaccinated against the very negativities that destroyed the Earth’s purity. So now, let me break down my version of the Key to Life as transcribed by me. Not the Pope, not Jesus or generations of mama’s. If we really knew who we were in the grand scheme of things, we would know that we are the ONE. The sum of the Whole. The One that not only creates experiences and learns from them but loves unconditionally without prejudice or judgments. Some of us just don’t remember who we are. There are those who became the epitome of what everyone else has dictated to them. Those who cannot think for themselves and have to be told what to like, whom to like, how to like and who they are. Oh, yeah, that’s not Deepak Chopra and that’s not the Dali Lama that is real shit for you. The key to life is to remember who you are and what you are here to experience.

Everyone is entitled to expression. Everyone is entitled to freedom of speech. It is when one forces their narrowed ideologies onto someone else is when I have a problem. These are the very narrow minded people that don’t even have the common sense to discover life on their own let alone question it. That, my friends, constitutes being a slave. A slave to the media and the propagation of nonsense. It IS truly the fool whose own tomatoes are sold to him!

The moral to the story: before you invade My Space with your bullshit, bounce it back to Your Space…

Disclaimer: The picture with the Ankh stays.